Thursday, May 1, 2008

Major Shoe Company

So today I got an order from someone who works for a major shoe company. I don't want to name names, but I've got to tell you guys that this is going to be one of my last posts to this blog before my amazing company gets bought out. Okay, obviously I'm smoking crack, but I want all of you major shoe company employees to read this carefully- It's time for you to own your very own Manly Man Candle Company.

Think about it! What a perfect fit! You could give everyone who buys a manly hiking boot a free small "Wild Alaska" candle to remind them of what they should be doing. Or maybe throw in a "Pina Colada" candle with every sandal. What an amazing idea!

Now it's time to talk turkey, major shoe company folks. This buyout would make you BILLIONS of dollars, so my company won't be cheap. Your first offer should be nine digits. Preferably big digits.

I'll wait for your call, except when I'm out shopping for my new Porsche or diamond pinky ring.

Oh, and you should probably hurry, because Starbucks has the idea of giving a free "Coffee Shop" with every latte. At least that's the rumor I'm starting.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

9 digits, huh? Large digits, huh? I'll offer $9.999999999 to buy the company... there's 10 "large digits." Will that work? No? Oh, all right... but my offer DID meet the qualifications you posted. I'd always wished someone would make candles that smelled good... wanting to make my own candles that had pleasant odors, not like the unholy stuff you find in candles everywhere else. Then, my supervisor told me about this blessed site that she had been informed about... and ta-da! I'm stuck checking this site every day now. I've got it tagged as a favorite on 2 computers.
Here I go rambling... *sniff* now i have to go home and light my pina colada. yipee!