Fireworks

Another 4th of July has come and gone, and amazingly I still have all my fingers. Happy birthday, America, you don't look a day over 175!

Is it just me or are fireworks today a little better than when I was a kid? I can still remember being thrilled to death lighting a firecracker, and today's kids get things that look like a napalm attack and can level a city block. How safe is all of this stuff?

Listen, all I'm saying is that if it makes a mushroom cloud upon detonation you might not want to let little Timmy light it himself. Get your wife to light it- Safety first, people!

My dogs are glad that the fireworks are done, that's for sure. I don't know what it is about these canines, but loud noises scare the crap out of them. My dog, the mini schnauzer (we got him from the pound, he was originally named Prince, now he's The Dog Formerly Known As Prince), gets so terrified that he just sits there and shakes. That makes him hot, so he starts panting, which makes him adorable. He's probably going to have a heart attack one year, but he'll look cute doing it.