Company uniform ideas

Now that we're selling literally tens of dollars of Manly Man Candles each week at the farmer's market I've decided that it's time for a company uniform. You know, something that the staff can wear that will really make us look professional, honest, and sexy. You know, something kind of tight fitting that will really show off my six pack abs and giant biceps. I'm not above using my raw sex appeal to generate sales.

I've kicked around a few ideas already. I first thought about overalls and cowboy hats, since both of those items are very manly, but I think people would confuse me for the world's coolest Hutterite. Next I thought about khaki shorts and Hawaiian shirts, because we are definitely a laid back company, but then I thought that might be a little stereotypical... Might help out with sales of Pina Colada, though, but it just wouldn't work with Hunting Lodge or Wild Alaska.

Also, the uniforms have to really cement the spirit of Manly Man Candle Company in people's heads. The uniforms should be just like the company- Fun, sexy, and modern. This kind of shot down my idea for suits of armor. So, now I'm thinking a white or deep red golf shirt with a slogan on it. Not too original, granted, but if the slogan is catchy enough the shirts will do the job.

And so, with a beautiful setup, I now present you with the top ten uniform slogans. Feel free to vote for your favorite.

1. Manly Man Candle Company: More smells than a college dorm room.

2. MMCC: Wanna smell something manly?

3. MMCC: For external use only

4. MMCC: No refunds!

5. MMCC: If you like our candles, tell a friend, if you don't, screw you.

6. MMCC: The manliest company in the history of ever.

7. MMCC: Buy a candle to cover up your incredibly bad body odor. Seriously.

8. MMCC: Yes, leather smells like leather. What did you expect?

9. MMCC: We're a real company. Give me your credit card number.

10. MMCC: I'm pretty sure Yankee Candles contain lead. Deadly, deadly lead. I read it somewhere, I think it was a news article on CNN.com or something like that. Maybe it wasn't lead, but I'm pretty sure it was something very, very poisonous. Could have been anthrax. Hmmm... Was it anthrax? No, that isn't right either. Anyway, it was very, very bad.


Those are just a few that popped into my head. I'll keep working on it. Hopefully we'll make up a bunch of them and you guys can buy them and wear them proudly. Don't get your hopes up for it being any time soon, though, because I like to take my time when it comes to... pretty much everything.